CHARLIE SHEEN'S POST RECOVERY DR'S APPOINTMENT CIRCA 2011

Dr. Hello Charlie

Charlie Sheen: WINNING BITCH, I have a special forward constitution. I have tiger blood.

Dr.: Yes, you also have Rhinoceros triglycerides and red panda cholesterol

Charlie Sheen: That is winning BITCH, winning.

Dr.: Even better though, you have the hepatic function of an Australian tiger shark.

Charlie Sheen: TIGER BLOOD BITCH!!

Dr.: I am giving you a clean bill of health so you may get back to work.

Charlie Sheen: Chuck Norris is an un-evolved bitch with no tiger blood. I CREATED CHUCK NORRIS. You know my name?

Dr: Charlie

Charlie Sheen: NO, it is ALPHA 3 from the clepton nebula of the evolved Adonis constitution. Later simpleton !

After that Charlie Sheen went on to star in a movie about his life filmed entirely on location in a tibetan monastery starting Justin Bieber and Alyssa Milano with cameos by Richard Gere, Moby, and Mr. T. Charlie's Dr. would retire and work as a freelance professor of veterinary medicine.  The point is you cannot begin to experience the awesomeness of this situation if you do not posses tiger blood.

MOVING ON

Often times I see and hear people say that any particular situation is so overwhelming that they cannot move forward. Break ups, make ups, shake ups, screw ups, and any ups or downs are too much. Then there are individuals who move along in a manner that is beyond relaxed, really just borderline catatonic. Why the contrast? Simple, because in life you have to fight to move on no matter what the situation, and you have to fight while moving in order to keep from becoming a stepping stone. People tend to do way more talking and bitching than moving and fighting. I have been guilty of this crime myself, allowing situations beyond my control to take over my spirit and desire. I don't think about it but the truth is that when I do it only serves as a lesson, a lesson that encourages me to want to be different. Over thinking something and letting it get the best of your mind, spirit, body, or whatever is an easy road to perpetual defeat. Not thinking at all leads to the same thing. So the answer, as I see it, is to move and fight do one while doing the other. I know it is so much easier to say than do, but, is there anything in life that is not difficult to some extent? I am sure people will look at this and comment on my lack of a thesis statement, or grammatically correct approach, to that I say a big I DON'T GIVE A SHIT. There is a point behind what is written here, the point is that there is always a fight to be fought and that makes life interesting if we choose to engage and continue. I do not know the answer to the riddle of life but I do know and clearly understand the challenge.

SCOOBY DOO AFTER 1972!

From 1969 to 1972 Scooby Doo had its glory run. A period of 19 years followed in which there were a good 5 to 6 incarnations of the show and they all sucked. In this day and age of reality television on whorish society let's talk about Scooby in realistic terms. I want to give a new breakdown of what would have happened to them after 1972.

Freddie Jones: The team captain and golden boy of the team. After 1972 Freddie was initially offered parts in American Graffiti, Paper Moon, Corvette Summer and was even offered the part of Han Solo in Star Wars. His demands for high salaries were too unrealistic and he was eventually reduced to guest appearances in Fantasy Island, Highway to Heaven, Emergency, and Falcon Crest. Freddie found himself looking for a new way to make money so he went into politics and ran unsuccessfully for US Congress, and Senate as an independent candidate whose platform was NO MORE OF THE SAME! Fred was disillusioned with politics and showbiz and became a very successful Commercial Real Estate broker. On a personal level Fred had a stormy relationship with Daphne that spanned from 1971 to 1978. Daphne and Fred had one child named William Alfred Jones. Today Fred and Willie are close and Fred and Daphne are on speaking terms. Fred still loves his cars avocado green and has a beautiful collection of ascots. Fred is still in litigation with Hanna Barbera for a his unpaid royalties.

Daphne Blake: Daphne was the sex kitten of the group, beautiful, exotic and fiery. After 1972 she was in a stormy relationship with Fred which spawned a child. From 1973 to 1974 Daphne was a regular on The New Dick Van Dyke Show Daphne was at one point rumored to be the love interest of Richard Dawson, host of Family Feud and her former co star. The rumors were not true as Daphne was famously repulsed by Richard Dawson's lascivious nature. After 1974 Daphne was a popular theatre star and appeared numerous times in "The Carol Burnett Show" and a regular guest on Mike Douglas. Daphne became dependent on painkillers but kicked the habit quickly after a stint in Betty Ford. Through the 80's Daphne focused on her music career, releasing 5 albums, 1 platinum and 4 gold. After her career stalled out in the 90's ad her grunge album "Red Crazy Society" tanked, she took a break. Daphne became an advocate for baby seals along with Brigitte Bardot. Today Daphne still does appearances, most notably in "JAG" and NCIS. Daphne and her son are extremely close and she and Fred maintain a good communication.

Velma Dinkley: "CHINKIES" Velma was the smart though socially awkward one of the group. A skilled writer, spectacular historian, and great conversationalist. Velma was Daphne's less attractive but really "amazing" friend. after 1972 Velma retired to her home in Beverly Hills, Velma was a shrewd investor so she had stashed a fortune in 3 short years. Velma established a clothing line to be sold in Sears, and Puerto Rican chain store Gonzalez Padin. The line was called Simply Velma. After the success of her line Velma wrote an autobiography detailing the debauchery at Hanna Barbera parties. She even detailed the near OD of Elroy Jetson, after leaning that he would no longer be employed if he grew any further. The book entitled " Heavens to Mergatron: Bunch of Asses" was a number one bestseller on the New York Times list for well over 47 weeks. Velma then wrote 5 thrillers, all of them number one. After 1987 Velma took a break and married She had twin boys, Ralph and Mitchell (b. 1988) and one girl, Gloria (b. 1990). After a 2002 divorce Velma has focused on her children and on her multiple business ventures.

Norville "Shaggy" Rogers: Shaggy was the constantly afraid, hungry, marijuana smoker. After 1972 Shaggy had nothing but a roller coaster life trying to focus on his music. Shaggy recorded a 1974 pop album with his girlfriend Josie. The album entitled " True Love" was certified gold. Success was short lived however as Shaggy and Josie split and Shaggy was almost immediately given a DUI. After spending 90 days in prison Shaggy was released to a career in shambles. By 1977 Shaggy had cleaned up his act and was now exercising regularly. In 1978 Shaggy was back in television doing guest spots in Fantasy Island and guest hosting "That's Incredible." Shaggy was on the comeback trail and everything was wonderful until 1982. When 1982 came around Shaggy fell of his bike on the pacific palisades busting up his leg and ankle and finding himself in rehabilitation with a new addiction to alcohol. After a long battle and several DUI arrests, Shaggy was clean and in the recording studio, he wrote many successful songs for Nirvana, Nine Inch Nails, and Pearl Jam. Shaggy fathered three kids with his girlfriend Shelly from Jabberjaw fame. Currently Shaggy lives in his Montana ranch raising Black Angus cattle. Hemp is also a big part of The Rogers Ranch as well.

Scooby Doo: Scooby was the perpetually frightened dog. After 72' Scooby Doo became a producer for Hanna Barbera  for 8 years. Scooby produced several shows from Astro to The Herculoids. In 1993 Scooby was instrumental in the sale of Hanna Barbera's catalog to Ted Turner for 394 million dollars. After a brief retirement Scooby attempted to launch his own superstation and after that failure led him to near bankruptcy Scooby found himself producing reality television and in crowded company as one of the many individuals to put his tongue down Paris Hilton's throat. Currently Scooby is attempting to produce a reunion show and a reality show based on the gang from Mistery Inc.

THE REVOLUTION

I love the idea of there being a site like kickstarter.com around to help aspiring filmmakers make their dreams come true. The purpose of the site is to help everyone that has some sort of entertainment related dream make that dream come true without having to go through 20,000 middlemen. It really irritates me when well established celebrities with means decide that they want to be a "part" of the revolution. The fact is that when people like Zach Braff decide to use their star power and name to get a project funded they are taking the playing field and turning it into their own personal playground. If I had to compare it to anything it would be to the US men's basketball team being comprised of all pro players and wining the gold by destroying the opposition which is comprised of less experienced players. It's true that not every kickstarter project reaches its goal but a lot of the ones that do go on to launch very successful careers.

Why does this bother me? I read an article about Kevin Smith stating that he would fund Clerks 3 with his own money because he did not want to take away from indy filmmakers that used kickstarter as a way to realize their ambitions. Why do stars that have access to funding or that have the money themselves fail to follow the Kevin Smith example? Many of the kickstarter projects that don't get financed actually have a lot of potential based on their descriptions alone. It's easy to have your project financed if you are a celebrity because everyone that gives a dollar is going to thump their chest saying "I helped Zach Braff" or " I helped the Veronica Mars people." My question to the people funding the celebrity project is: Do you honestly think you will get a heartfelt thank you" Do you think that these celebrities will give you a second thought in the future?

I will say Garden State was a pretty good film and I did enjoy Scrubs but I don't agree with someone using his name to fund a damn vanity project. There are a lot of legit talents whose only chance comes from sites like kickstarter and now they have to step back because the Scrubs guy wants to fund a project that will likely earn over 20 million and net him probably 2 or 3 million of that to say the least. I say if you are going to donate, donate to projects that really need it. Let established celebrities use their name, connections, and own dime for their projects. It's bullshit that celebrities want to take mediums like this instead of using their own means. Zach Braff has already raised a cool million and chances are he will raise what he needs in the allotted time. Does anyone know about Dov Simens' movie cloud project?

Chances are high no one knows about the Dov Simens project and how it attempts to give the indy people their shot.

Seriously if you want to give someone a chance give it to someone that wants to help the process and not step in the fucking way. Also look to projects that try to educate people on how to improve their chances of making it in the industry. Look at people like Gary W. Goldstein, trying to help people either establish their career or further enhance it. Here is an idea for a serious revolution "SAY NO TO CELEBRITIES" Share this blog on your facebook, twitter, anywhere and fucking say no to celebrities. You have the power so use it to protect your own territory, the globe is wide open because of social media the territory is getting easier to navigate so SAY NO TO CELEBRITIES!

THE WAY TO HANDLE A JACKASS

Have you ever noticed the pseudo intellectual air of people that lob thinly veiled criticism? To me it's a thing of beauty witnessing people attempt to flex the thought muscle. I have been through that so many times, getting that unrequested and unwanted piece of shit advice. I love to just sit back and listen just so that I can pick out the twenty little mistakes in the advice itself. I have lived that and dealt with it since the day I realized I wanted to become a writer. I will never cease to be amazed by people giving their opinions with regards to everything that they know nothing about.

When it comes to people giving unwanted and unrequested advice and criticism I have come up with a ten step plan and the plan goes as follows:

1. Sit
2. Listen
3. Pay close attention
4. Allow yourself to go to a place other than the one you are in mentally
5. Count 25 sheep 
6. Think about your favorite food
7. Think about your favorite show
8. Think about your favorite movie
9. Think about your favorite muppets character 
10. FART!

Nothing clears a room and ends a conversation you don't want to have more effectively than a lethal fart. It doesn't matter the distance because farting is the universal language of discomfort. Yes, thats the way to handle it just fart until you feel a weight has left your body. Maybe this doesn't work for you in principle and perhaps it won't work in practice but it's still worth a shot. 

DEATH, A POEM

I had this dream, I don't know if it was real but so real it seemed
Death came for me
Not a word
It wasn't a skeleton
It did not wield a scythe
I did not want to go
I did not know what it was
There was no cloak in this spirit
There was no form at all
Death was a mere cloud
It took me through a hall

I walked many steps
At one point I stopped
Death was now in front
When suddenly the cloud dropped
It formed a stream on the floor
Rivers of reflection
I guess death was giving me time for retrospection
I was so young upon first glance
Here I was looking at my life
Stripped down for an eventual rise

Death my friend what it this?
I see ships with hulls all of them rotting
The ships sink to the water as they make a big mess
Things keep happening
I can't well see the rest
Death my dear friend it's been like a ride
I look upon my life with a great deal of pride

I ask death one more time what's going on
It doesn't respond and something is wrong
What will I do?
What did I do?
Everything is odd
I am dead
I have not bled
My clothes are not red
Why death?
What has my attitude bred?

Death told me
I was good
I was decent
My parting was not recent
It takes time to see my life
Even if I was good and polite
Thank you death I know I did right

THE BOSTON TRAGEDY

So here we are again, a normal day and another attack in our back yard. This time the attack happened during a joyous occasion that was supposed to make the news for a million reasons non of which included death and injury. The number of deaths and injuries in this bombing pales in comparison to the deaths and injuries in the World Trade Center attacks of 9/11, but it was still a horrible tragedy. Let's break it down briefly and see what it all means.

Two young guys with a belief that the world should be Islam are the presumed guilty. A building came down and we are reminded that there is no longer a safe place and that we are no longer allowed to feel any sort of peace or levity. It was interesting how the venue for this attack was a marathon. The message here was clear and that message is that there is no finish line to cross. Do we blame someone? Do we blame a set of beliefs?

Once the guilty parties have paid for their crimes we are still left asking questions that can never be answered. The ideas and theories are now coming out of the woodwork like they did in 9/11. An aunt of the two suspects said this was "staged" and her angel nephews were framed. These events will cause that rift and idea that all immigrants are bad and that Islam is terrorism. There will be misunderstandings and insecurity, a clear example that the actions of a few misguided fools are enough to judge entire populations.

The ultimate statement is that terrorism no longer has a stereotypical face. Terrorism is no longer limited to an organized group but it could be anyone with a belief so extreme and ardent that that they are willing to kill, injure and die for their so called cause. Yes here we are again and once more the result is confusion, a universal question, and no possible justice or answers. We are living in a world that is no longer easily defined.

This tragedy can never be undone and the people deeply affected can never forget what happened. We as a nation are reminded of dark moments that serve as a definition to our history. The biggest reminder this tragedy is giving us is the reminder that we are a beacon of hope and the defining standard. We as a nation enjoy freedom, opportunity, choice, and many other advantages. While we are not a perfect nation it's our allowance to be imperfect that makes us function the way we do.

WHICH CAME FIRST, THE CHICKEN OR THE GENERAL?

I have always loved indulging in the occasional chinese take out dish. One of my favorite dishes is the very popular General Tso's chicken. I never thought much about the name because to be totally honest with you I just did not care. While in world history class I remember learning about various dynasties, empires, and military figures in China with one said figure being General Tso. When I heard the good General's name I asked the obvious question: Was that the chicken guy? I was told, to great surprise, that more than likely he never invented or tasted his famous chicken. I was shocked and left with a feeling that I somehow needed to complete a pointless quest to learn the truth behind General Tso and the chicken. I asked the universal question: Which came first, the chicken or the General?

I studied a little more about the good General in order to better understand why he was chosen to be immortalized in every chinese take out menu in America. As it turns out the General was quite a military strategist over a significant span of his 73 year life. The General suppressed the Dungan revolt and served during the Qing Empire's civil war against the Taiping Rebellion which saw 20 million deaths. Early on the good General did not show as much promise and was a somewhat average citizen but his thirst and hunger for knowledge led him to study and understand political economy as well as western sciences. The General would eventually hold highly influential posts and serve as a key figure in the development of other military figures for years to come.

I decided to research the chicken only to learn that it was claimed by multiple places from New York to Taiwan and that it was in actuality named after the General as a way to honor him. I was thoroughly disappointed that the General never actually cooked said chicken and that the whole thing was just to keep his name alive. The truth is it would have been cool if the General would have been like the Chinese Colonel Sanders. Can you imagine a meeting between Colonel Sanders and General Tso? I can imagine that the meeting would not have really gone well given the fact that they did not speak one another's languages and that they did not have the same chicken methodology. Alas I dare to dream the impossible.

Thank you General Tso for your contribution to chicken and your lesser highlighted military achievements.

FUCK YOU JUSTIN BIEBER, YOU LITTLE ASS

Justin Bieber is a fucking little ass that has an uncanny ability to prove how a moron never really changes his moron stripes. How can this little fucker say that he wishes Anne Frank would have been a fan? Anne Frank was a fighter and a survivor that used writing and her imagination to keep her sane during the worst possible time. Anne Frank's story served as a glimpse into a window of time that was a huge example of human nature at its worst.

Anne Frank lived in a damn attic hiding with her family and another family for way too long. To stupidly say she would have been a "beliber" is to take everything she stood for and make it irrelevant. If anything this little ass should be a fan of Anne Frank's. Maybe the weed Justin smokes is preventing him from actually making comments that are halfway intelligent and giving him the ability to go complete dumbass. I wonder if Justin knows the whole story about how she survived and coped, about her typhoid fever leading to her death, her father Otto, or Miep Gies. I think Justin is a clear example of an idiot celebrity that knows a lot about nothing.

I don't like Justing Bieber and I can't respect him on a personal level, it's not a talent issue. Justin Bieber says " Anne was a great girl" and " She would have been a Belieber." Seriously what does this two dollar Elvis impersonator think? Saying something like that shows and incredible lack of depth and sensibility. I can  appreciate what Justin Bieber has done professionally but he needs to learn to measure his words carefully because quite honestly he is not the center of the world.

FUCK YOU BIEBER!

TOO MUCH BEAVER IS NEVER A GOOD THING

If you are reading this chances are you think this is some sort of pornographic entry. I hate to disappoint  but this is not what you think. I am talking about our little wonderful friend the beaver. I think that too much of those little bastards is a bad thing. In order to illustrate my point I will bring forward the story of a man in Belarus that was killed by a beaver that objected more than vociferously to having its picture taken. I can't not emphasize enough how dangerous it is to try and take pictures of animals in their habitat.

I can imagine what will go on this man's headstone " Beloved Father........Mauled By Belarusian  Beaver." I am not making fun of the guy but the truth is that you will die if you try to get too close to a lovable creature. Everyone will remember what happened to Steve Irwin after he decided to get overly personal with a stingray. You just can't trust animals in their habitat or otherwise. I love animals but I refuse to invade their space.

I never saw Jaques Cousteau get so close to fish that he put himself in the middle of a dangerous situation. I think this is another cautionary tale that animals in the wild are to be left alone. Seriously nature lovers it's okay to love animals just don't be stupid about it.

WHY I NEVER UNDERSTOOD THE MILKSHAKE SONG

Back about eight years ago there was this song about milkshakes by Kelis. I never really understood the song because I assumed it was a song about a girl owning a diner with a secret milkshake recipe. I thought the song had a catchy rhythm and was great in terms of getting people to go to their yards and start milkshake stands. I liked the fact that the song's video promoted supporting local old time diners and creating relationships as well.

I thought Kelis did a bang up job giving people a good examples of fitness, diners, relationships, and a good life in her video. I would say Kelis created a perfect PSA. I was absolutely positively shocked when I heard that the song was about sex. I questioned myself and others with " How can that be?" I know Kelis is interested in helping the community not letting it down with songs about sex and semen. I was shocked and disappointed that said song was in fact about paying for sexual favors.

Alas I had come to a bitter shock upon closer inspection of the milkshake song. I knew the truth now about Kelis and her milkshake bringing all the boys to the yard. I never understood it because I was just an innocent youngster of 25 with so much to learn in life.

EVERY MALL IS THE SAME

Have you ever been to a mall and realized that all the malls in the world are the same? It's funny but it doesn't matter what language you speak or where you are located it's all the same. Everywhere you go there is some Sunglass Hut, H&M, and so on and so forth. What is interesting to me is the fact that every mall in the world has a little bit of everything and it's all the same.

You are in the mall and you see the little boy in the stroller pitching a fit because his mother has been shopping for shoes for over five hours. Another common sighting is the four or five teenage girls that are loud, obnoxious, and stuck in a warp zone of perennial stupidity. Then as you move forward you see the couple that you wonder how in the hell they got together in the first place.

Once you move on to the food court you see the same group of punk teenagers talking some bullshit about girls they want to nail and games of magic. Malls are the common ground for everyone to meet on. The food court has no guest list, stores can't keep you from coming in and cinnamon rolls unite everyone in peace and happiness.

The mall is the United Nations where every individual, big, small, annoying, senseless, and full of shit meet to quietly size each other up. Long live the mall!

THE TROUBLE WITH NARROW VISION

I have to say that  my unconventional way of looking at life makes me a tad bit impractical. I am the kind of person that believes that nothing in life is absolutely impossible and in some ways that makes me sort of an outsider in circles of normalcy. I don't know if anyone has ever stopped to really try and count the number of times they have been told they can't do something.

I won't say that I would have a million dollars if I had a dollar for every time I heard that. I will say that I would have enough to make it rain in the club, if you catch my meaning and if not please stop reading. Hearing that you can't accomplish something is hurtful and disheartening but more often than not it comes from people that are narrow minded and easily contented.

I think that narrow vision is a clear example of that theory that we only use about five percent of our brain. The human mind is a powerful tool but without vision, ambition, it's really rather irrelevant. Narrow vision makes people pessimistic, negative, and ultimately impossible to be around.

I know that this particular entry focuses on things that can't really be quantified nor examined in any way other than through studies that focus on human nature and habit. I don't really study the human mind or human behavior but I do focus on my hatred for negativity and its providers.

The trouble with a narrow mind and vision is negativity and the best response is HELLO FUCK FACE! EAT SHIT.

WHEN YOU REMEMBER

Annette Funicello passed on at the age of 70 after a lengthy battle with MS. It's fair to say that Annette Funicello was an American icon that stood for an era that was transitional from black and white perfection to societal uproar. I want to write about this because by the time I discovered America's mousketeer she was already fighting MS at the  age of 49. I remember watching Back to the Beach and becoming interested in that 60's era of beach films that signaled the end of real innocence in America.

I did not know the entire "magical" story of Disney's original TV stars partly because there were so many of them. Annette seemed to be that one big name that transcended the mouse ears and moved on to more grown up but very clean entertainment. I thought the movies were bland but then again I grew up during a period when films such as Robocop, Predator, and Terminator were the order of the day.

I caught the story of a person that was fighting for her life and putting a face to an powerful disease. Annette was that star that gained a new following by virtue of her courage in a losing battle as opposed to her actual body of work. What I saw in her was a sweet woman that was dealt a harsh blow and yet moved forward gracefully and quietly. Annette walked away from from public life before succumbing to the long term effects of MS.

Annette's last appearance was less than a year ago on a news report about her battle with MS. Annette was unable to move or speak only able to make a few facial moves. Annette's body was hardly mobile and she was no longer the beauty that dazzled the eyes. Annette Funicello was no more but one thing really hit home, her courage.

Annette courageously fought a losing battle in the public eye for well over five years. Annette's battle with MS spanned for over two and a half decades. Maybe Annette was not a star whose work will stand out as masterful and whose image as a clean cut star may well be her legacy but it was that lengthy battle that will keep her alive as an example of dignity and courage.

I'll never know about the 1950's mega child star, teen movie queen, pop star, and icon. I will always remember the Disney lady that put up one hell of a fight for almost three decades.

WAVING OFF THAT PART OF MY CHILDHOOD

With the death of Margaret Thatcher I realized that I just waved bye bye to a part of my childhood. I was a child during the 80's when Reagan was POTUS, Thatcher was Prime Minister and Gorbachev was lead Soviet guy. I can't really say I had much of a grip on the world political climate of the times because I was more interested in cartoons and toys than anything else but I always had an admiration for Margaret Thatcher.

I looked at margaret Thatcher as that quietly, passively dominant and overbearing aunt that you hated and admired at the same time. Mrs. Thatcher reminded me of an aunt my mother had who dressed in similar fashion and had an equally arrogant and superior air about herself. What I think made Thatcher fascinating was the fact that she was a woman in a male dominated scene. It doesn't matter if you agreed with her politics or not she made her way up the ladder during a time when women were very rarely in power positions.

Thatcher's career spanned 31 years from 1959 to 1990 and she was considered a close ally to the US during the final years of the Cold War. Thatcher's strength and resolve made her a true legend and put her in the same category as Sir Winston Churchill. There will always be differing opinions but the fact is that her career will stand out as a major part of an incredible legacy.

A NORTH AMERICAN UNION

I am sure everyone knows about the hypothetical union between the US, Mexico, and Canada. The union would be something similar to the EU and would yield a universal currency known as the Amero. This is something of a hot button issue that has had conspiracy theorists and anti- Bush individuals alike up in arms for a long time. Since the North American Union is hypothetical let's for a second look at what could be.

 The currency union happens and suddenly the peso is no longer worthless. The currency union happens and suddenly the US dollar is no more. I also imagine the implications of citizenship for Canadians and Mexicans alike. Mexicans would no longer face immigration issues because making a move would no longer be a life or death issue.  Those are all the pros, but what about the cons?

The cons are that I think given tensions over immigration and the enormous amount of ignorance in some portions of the US, it would create a major amount of discomfort. I think the reason why a North American Union would not work as effectively is simply because Mexico, the US, and Canada are three enormous countries with highly differing views on multiple issues. Ultimately the fact that so many people view power as something of a mysterious issue that is only understood by those that wield it, it would mean great civil unrest among three major nations.

I doubt that the North American Union will ever exist because honestly the geographical way of thinking is entirely too different in this part of the world. Still it's interesting to dig deeper into the concept and look at legitimately possible scenarios.

NORTH KOREA

Every time I look at a picture of Kim Jong Un he reminds me of a child that looks blankly into the heavens after being told that he cannot have an ice cream cone because of his pre disposition to diabetes. I read recently that North Korea has made it clear that they won't hesitate to launch one of their 1950's missiles if or when necessary. The problem with North Korea as I see it is that they are a lot like a dog that looks nice but you know he will bite you if you go near its tail.

I think North Korea is a serious threat just by virtue of the fact that they are so vocal about kicking ass on a nuclear world wide scale but I also believe that Kim Jong Un is not really the power behind the throne. King Jong Un is an example of a kid that was cast into an incredibly difficult situation by a zealous father trying to create a legacy in the same manner that a constipated man tries to create acceptable stool samples. Kim Jong Un looks more comfortable watching a game with Dennis Rodman than standing in front of a bunch of Generals in his unflattering outfit that I am assuming was designed by his father at some point during the great polyester shortage of 1979.

I think the real tragedy here is that this kid is lost in a world where bad decisions are encouraged as a WWDD or What would dad do?  I wonder how a 30 year old man is capable of really truly leading a nation when his only real qualification is being the owner's kid. I assume that things will only get dimmer and dimmer and that eventually one of his "uncles" will sit him on a rocket and watch him fly straight into the sun.