Have you ever noticed the pseudo intellectual air of people that lob thinly veiled criticism? To me it's a thing of beauty witnessing people attempt to flex the thought muscle. I have been through that so many times, getting that unrequested and unwanted piece of shit advice. I love to just sit back and listen just so that I can pick out the twenty little mistakes in the advice itself. I have lived that and dealt with it since the day I realized I wanted to become a writer. I will never cease to be amazed by people giving their opinions with regards to everything that they know nothing about.
When it comes to people giving unwanted and unrequested advice and criticism I have come up with a ten step plan and the plan goes as follows:
- Sit
- Listen
- Pay close attention
- Allow yourself to go to a place other than the one you are in mentally
- Count 25 sheep
- Think about your favorite food
- Think about your favorite show
- Think about your favorite movie
- Think about your favorite muppets character
- FART!
Nothing clears a room and ends a conversation you don't want to have more effectively than a lethal fart. It doesn't matter the distance because farting is the universal language of discomfort. Yes, thats the way to handle it just fart until you feel a weight has left your body. Maybe this doesn't work for you in principle and perhaps it won't work in practice but it's still worth a shot.
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