SEX TROLL UTOPIA

Social media has given birth......to the sex troll. The social media sex troll is usually a shorter, stubby fella with delusions of grandeur. Normally the sex troll will be rounder but he'll be trying hard to beef up. The Sex Troll lexicon will be something of an enigma. Sex trolls are well read, they usually read like twenty pages of Shapkespeare and will use the kind of dialogue that will confuse you enough to think " maybe this is a smart individual." The sex troll will normally be a male that has engaged in the art of chronic masturbation. Sex Trolls are the terrorists of dating because they make together fellas like me look like shit. The following are examples of the sex troll dialogue:

"Women must smell a man's scent"

"I'm gong to harvard in three years"

"I'll give you a Vegas bow tie"

"I'm feeling positive"

" Gotta hit my gym, lift some weights, and write three chapters of my novel " The Great American Chronicle of America."

" I love abstract, cerebral,thinky films."

"We can be friends."

In the end social media sex trolls are killing the twitter, the Facebook, fucking up the linkedin, and decimating tout ( is that still a thing?). Be on the lookout people, be on the lookout!

SOCIAL MEDIA.......A DECADE LATER

If I had the dime for every time I hear the term social media chances are I'd probably be very popular at my local strip establishment of choice. While Social Media is one of the most annoying, overused terms ever it does make me think back to when I first joined Facebook. To me Facebook was somewhat useless, but fast forward nearly a decade and Facebook, like twitter. has become a part of my daily routine. It's funny though, Facebook has a feature that allows you to see how long a person has been your friend. It's incredible to imagine that some of these "friendships" are six and seven years old. You may never meet these people but in you are tied to their lives in a very real and sometimes emotional way. With social media you witness triumph, tragedy, success, failure. I'm not a huge advocate for social media, not at least from a super personal perspective but I am impressed nonetheless at how this phenomenon has taken the pen pal relationship to a whole new level.

FUCK YOUR SELFIE DRAMA

I'm so amused at all the celebrities that complain about their naked selfies being leaked. Here's a thought, if you are going to complain about it then don't take it in the first place. The latest wave came around came because of Jennifer Lawrence's topless pics being leaked. It's okay if you want nude pics but don't complain when you get hacked. If you want your privacy respected make a polaroid and put it in your safe. We live in an age where hacking is a common and not so complicated practice, stop acting shocked and pretending not to like the attention that your stupidity gets you.

WHAT I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE WRITING ABOUT.......TODAY

Chances are you are expecting some diatribe with facts and what have you, that's not happening. I'm giving you a top ten, make what you will and enjoy it.

1. Obama
2. Death
3. Kim Kardashian
4. Kanye West
5. Religious Wars
6. Iraq
7. The Economy 
8. Tulips
9. The OJ Trial
10. Hostage exchanges

Have a great Saturday!

HELP OUT THESE GUYS

Rarely do you ever have an opportunity to help make something great happen. I can get on a crowd funding site and tell you to please give me money for my film but really, is a VHS tape of an old man farting a film? I want to tell you about a great film 28 Minute Epic.  Go check out its kickstarter at: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/827894937/28-minute-epic. Check out what these guys are about and donate something, even if it's just a few dollars, make something great happen for some great and highly talented guys!

WHY IT'S SO IMPORTANT TO MEDITATE

Meditation is likely one of the best, if not the best therapy in the world. I find myself over thinking sometimes and angry as well. I find that when I sit and meditate I get to that place that we all long to be. My process may not be comparable to that of a buddhist monk's but it works. I have a couple of ways one of which works as follows:

• I sit 
• I take five deep breaths 
• I close my eyes
• I clear my head 
• I slow my breathing down to the point where I'm fully relaxed

I usually do that for about five minutes and I find that it works for me. To me it's important because I have a bit of a fuse and like anyone else, it goes off every now and again. While some call meditation a fad o BS, I call it the best therapy. Imagine a day where the following things happen: 

• A tire explodes 
• A pipe bursts 
• You burn the souffle
• The cat pissed on the laptop

 How would you rather deal with that day? There's the possibility to do it angrily or do so with calm. If you do it angrily it will look like this: 

Why beat the shit out of someone with a keyboard when you can deal with your bad day in a relaxed way. I recommend meditation, yoga, pretty much anything to keep that emotion in check. All jokes and fun aside make sure to chill because life's too short. 

WHY SOCIAL MEDIA IS THE TRUE VOICE OF THE PEOPLE

There are billions of people on this earth, each with a different opinion. Social media outlets, our Facebook, Twitter, Blogger, and other mediums are our collective voice. We have a way to express our  likes, dislikes, and opinions. No one man, nor any legislative body can speak for us collectively. Yes we face a lot of things with social media that we did not normally have to worry about.

We face identity theft, we face stalkers, but really we face danger every day so social media is no different. With social media we make friends, business connections, we discover new interests and sometimes we discover our true weakness. Social media connects us with family that we otherwise would not be connected with.

Social media has accomplished what no other advent ever could, it has homogenized the world. We all have one thing that can link us together no matter how far apart geography can put us.

A TALK WITH THE MAKERS OF 28 MINUTE EPIC

When it comes to film I like to look around me instead of in front of me. It's this way that I find the best stories to listen to. A good example is my interview with GianCarlo Fernandez and Rocco Petrullo, the makers of the upcoming film 28 Minute Epic. Here's what they had to say:

Can you give us a brief synopsis of your film? 

28 Minute Epic: The story about Jim and Dave, aimless Jersey boy best friends, who are recently fired from their cushy porn-shop jobs, and decide to become superheroes for hire in order to at attain financial stability after accidentally saving someones life. With help from a "professional" crime fighter, they find that being a hero isn't always super.

Rocco Petrullo (Writer/Actor/ Producer)

Rocco tell us a little bit about yourself

1. I was born and raised in Garfield , New Jersey. Never has the thought of being anything other than a film maker crossed my mind. After getting  a BFA in film making from Montclair State University, I became a free lance videographer and editor, all while doing stand up comedy and writing many short films.

2. I am interested in writing, acting, and directing films. I’m a big cinema fan and study movies constantly. I  examine what the conventions of films are, then I see if there is a way to subvert them.

3. When I was young, I always loved movies and that translated into writing short stories. In High School and College I furthered developed it into short films.

You're up GianCarlo tell us about your background, interests, love of film

GianCarlo Fernandez (Writer/Director/Producer) 

1. I was born in Los Angeles, California and raised in Edison, New Jersey. I honed my creative energies at Montclair State University, where I studied fine arts with a concentration in filmmaking and film production. My ambition and skill-set, evidenced by my overachieving student films, quickly earned me a rare internship with Michael Uslan, the famed Batman producer and CEO of BatFilm Production, INC. Under the mentorship of Michael Uslan and fellow producer F.J. Desanto, I contributed ideas and got first-hand experience in film development on over a dozen major studio films while still in college.

2. I am interested in all things film, art, photography, technology and literature. I am also a health nut and receational soccer player. 

3. My fervor for film and filmmaking started at a young age with acting out Rocky movies and watching Psycho on a weekly basis with my little sister. I got curious about the process and eventually started using my mothers video camera to film my sister and myself doing silly things and pretend we were making a movies. I remember thinking I could actually make a film after watching Chasing Amy for the first time. 

Can you give us a little bit of information on the cast/crew? 

We have a great group of people that are just as passionate about the film as we are. So far we have all worked for free because we all believe in the project and know that we can get it funded through a crowd funding site like kickstarter.com. Everyone involved has a specific job to do but we all wear multiple hats during production. This film is true collaboration of talents. 

GianCarlo Fernandez is the co-writer/director/producer/editor 

Rocco Petrullo is the co-writer/actor/producer

Main Cast:

Rocco Petrullo as Jim/The Masked Avenger, is a trained actor that has experience in stand up comedy and has been in multiple short films. This is his first feature film. 

Patrick Lithgow as Dave/Spanky, is a trained theater actor that has been in many plays. This is his first feature film. 

Steve Boghossian is a trained actor that has been in short films and an extra on feature films. This is his first feature film. 

Cinematographer/Colorist: Danny O’Halloran is an NYU trained DP with tons of experience in short films, music videos, marketing videos and more. He is also a a frequent collaborator with GianCarlo Fernandez. 

Assistant Cameraman: Alain Nonguierma, Johnny George 

Executive Producers: Alain Nonguierma, Johnny George 

What are the goals for the film?

We want to show that a bunch of local guys who have training and ambition can produce a great film that will make people laugh. We hope to take our finished film to many festivals this upcoming year and find a distributor to get the film out there to the masses. 

Do you think it’s easier to be in film now? 

The only easy thing about being in film now is finding good equipment to shoot with. The competition is greater, and it’s easier to get lost in the shuffle, but we have learned that creativity, talent and drive can make a project shine through. 

Got any advice for people trying to break in:

Always over prepare so you’re not underprepared. Following your dreams is great but you need to know what to do when your faced with the reality of making that dream come true. 

Closing thoughts:

Making a film is a crazy endeavor, but that’s what this movie is about. Following your dreams on the off chance that it will pay off because you’ve worked so hard to make it come to fruition. We appreciate you taking the time to find out more about the film. Thank you for your time. Below we have attached links to our clips and social media. Our kickstarter campaign will be launching this month so we’ll keep you posted when it does. We leave you with this thought: what’s better than 15 minutes of fame? 28! 

Thank you for the time gentlemen and best of luck with your film. Please make sure you follow the film , bellow are links to the trailers and social media: 

https://www.facebook.com/28MINUTEEPIC?ref=hl

Teaser Intro

http://nerdjerseypodcast.com/exclusive-clip-from-28-minute-epic/

Teaser 1. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QpO2xxk_0cQ

Teaser 2.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35md_a7GL7A

Teaser 3. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNKb8kitC1s 

Teaser 4. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wCk0cxLQMI

2. YouTube Channel http://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3uR8ixcyYj30HR7vCJLjcA

3. Tumblr http://28-minute-epic.tumblr.com

4. Twitter @28MinuteEpic

5.Instagram @28MinuteEpic

HASHTAG, POUND SIGN, NUMBER SIGN, TIC TAC TOE, LINES SQUARED

I was watching the Justin Timberlake and Jimmy Fallon hashtag skit and laughing and suddenly I realized that jackassery has run away with society. If you are wondering what I mean, please allow me to elaborate. The number sign has evolved into a way for people to state what their feelings are without actually taking the time to write an articulate sentence. I get it, I think it's cool that we want to be less complicated as a society but # FUCK.

If you want to say you are happy in writing I have a perfect solution and that is writing " I'm happy today" as opposed to # Happy, # Got laid Friday, # Sexomatic. People have actually take to using words that do not exist through the use of the tic tac toe board. I am impressed about one thing though and that is the versatility of this symbol.

Prince, an all time great, was once known as a symbol and yet his symbol did not really last. I think that maybe Prince should have called himself Hashtag, or the currently #Prince, maybe prince would still be selling Purple Rain numbers. I want to pin the use of the hash on every dried up bitch of a high school english teacher # Old Whore, # Killed Shakespeare, # Got the pension.

I remember that abbreviation in writing was a no no back in the day, the problem was that when it happened we were chastised and ridiculed. Now everyone uses the hashtag, I wonder if in the future the hashtag will become a part of # grammar. I think this epidemic, trend, or whatever the fuck it is, may well be a conspiracy between trekkies, and other # never got laid fanboys, to start some sort of space language. I wonder how exactly we would express love with the hashtag in terms of love.

I just don't subscribe # out of touch, # I don't really give a fuck, # hash is a hell of a drug, # hash is in a brownie too motherfucker.

OH NO! HANNAH MONTANA TURNED TO BESTIALITY WITH THE DANCING BEAR JAMBOREE

So Miley Cyrus decided to "shed" the Hannah Monatana image by having pretend intercourse with the dancing bear jamboree. I feel kind of bad for Miley because at the VMA's she managed to just look like a crack whore trying desperately to get laid by anyone not frightened of herpes. Miley Cyrus made her career playing a child star with a magic wit and a halfwit hillbilly dad. Miley Cyrus is not as talented as a prime Madonna, she's not really much of anything other than shock value.

Miley needs to pretend to the asshole of a bear in order to get attention. The truth is Miley's voice is annoying, her moves are kind of shitty, and like almost every other performer today she has no knowledge of music. The VMA's are not now, and they have never been, anything other than real shock. People watch the VMA's to see celebrities perform without filter, which is exactly what Miley Cyrus did.

The reason why Miley needed to perform like this is because she needs visuals in order to hide how bad she is. Miley seems to be so uninteresting that even Drake decided to indulge tweets from Amanda Bynes rather than listen to her shit. I'm pretty sure Will Smith and his kids were thinking " Mama no!" when they say Miley's ass less twerking sequences.

MTV used to stand for music television because they played videos. Now MTV should stand for something else because truthfully it just runs shit shows that reward people whose talents are questionable, for the most part. I still think Justin Timberlake, Robin Thicke, Pink, and others are talented but they don't get as much attention as an anorexic whore.

THE SOCIAL MEDIA PREDICTABLE

I love social media simply because you have so many things that you can use to entertain yourself. I am thoroughly entertained by the predictable players. A predictable player is some lame ass dude that will respond to a girl. What I like about that is the fact that all those motherfuckers are the same. Some beautiful girl accepts them or adds them and they respond with the following:

• Yo girl, sit that shit on my face.
• It's an honor to be amongst the list if the fortunate to call themselves your friend.
• Sexy 
• So hot baby, I invite you to me.
• I love you, have an incredible day. 
• This is for you princess of the universe.

This is better than candy crush, human nature is something else.

YOU LEARN

Sometimes you have to step back and look at someone else's work, in order to learn something. I stepped back recently and read the work of a fellow blogger in depth. I'll cal him the rat because that's what he calls himself. Some of his entries are longer than other and they cover a wide variety of things, from news, to blues, to life. I enjoyed the reads simply because they taught me that in blogging life, you don't have to write a million things to be clear. I like the fact that I don't necessarily agree with everything Rat writes, because it makes me think about different perspectives. I have seen people get out of the mohave simply because they don't agree, I guess ignorance works that way. I want to say to the rat, thanks, I learned a neat trick.

THE SHUFFLE

The word social media has a million implications with the chief one being a platform for communication with perfect strangers. As with everything, social media has become a buzz monster like radio became in the 1920's. I see social media today as something of a beast that gets fed by people's ego. I remember reading this one kid's resume where he cited his clout score of 51 and climbing as a sort of marketable skill. Social media is a shuffle and everyone wants in, some to get laid, some go get played, some just to get sprayed.

WHEN I DON'T ASK PLEASE SHUT THE HELL UP

Have you ever dealt with a nosy person? Have you ever heard of someone you don't know giving opinions on your life? I have been a recipient of that a few times. I feel like bursting every time it happens, at least I did in the past. Today, whenever I hear unrequested opinions, I laugh simply because said opinions are an example of people's desires to live vicariously through others. Opinionated people are a lot like football dads, in that they all want to get their kids to do what they could not.

I have heard a million people say a million things and, as time passes, I find myself less annoyed by this occurrence. I do understand that it's human to have an opinion, I do think it's annoying to have more than one opinion on the same matter though. My reaction to this particular situation is simply to smile, nod, and think " I can't wait until a horny hippopotamus fucks you right up the ass." I know this is a little bit of a jerk attitude on my part but fuck it, life is short.

SOMEONE SHOULD SHUT THE FUCK UP

I like to think of myself as middle of the road in many aspects. I think that most of the time I try to employ common sense when formulating my views. There is the occasion when my feelings will overwhelm my senses and ultimately lead me to that feeling of "damn it" and so on. There is one particular person whose views always piss me off though, a fucking jackass by the name of Geraldo something or other. Let me give you the run down on Geraldo, in case you haven't heard of him, or harbored feelings of hatred for him.

Geraldo Rivera is a hit or miss reporter, talk show host, war correspondent that calls himself a conservative and yet has been a complete jackass for nearly forty years. This is a man that accuses people of racism consistently and yet he himself has been making an ass of himself talking about the Martin/ Zimmerman case as FOX's legal correspondent. I am not going out and saying that Rivera is a moron, I am simply stating he acts like one.

Personally I think this guy is a joke and half. This is a man that wanted the anchor chair in NBC and thought that the book "Exposing Myself" would not be a bad idea. I am hispanic but to be honest I don't see this loud mouth fucker as a credit to the race, if anything I see him as a self entitled faker with little to no credibility. Personally I don't think he knows what the hell he is. This fucker wants to be taken seriously but he tweets a picture of himself almost naked taking about how 70 is the new 50. In case you don't think that's a bit of a joke, please, remember Al Capone's vault. Yes people, Geraldo is the guy that made a huge deal about a vault that he felt had untold treasures and instead it led him to years in the trash talk circuit.

For years Geraldo Rivera has been making an ass of himself and honestly he is as sickening as the Kardashians. Let me say this, I propose Geraldo get on the Ryan Seacrest Productions bandwagon and develop something. I see it now, "Gearaldo does the San Fernando Valley" I don't care who is offended by this and I could give a shit what a potential Geraldo fan might say. The fact is that Geraldo needs to start taking some Metamucil and get the fuck off the air. Geraldo, you are no Cronkite, you are not even Eric Sevareid after all your "brave" trips to Iraq you can't even call yourself an equal to Donahue. Please Geraldo, shut the fuck up and take what little dignity you have and go home.

YOU JUST NEVER REALLY KNOW

A long time ago in a black and white galaxy far away a man by the name of Edward R. Murrow was introducing the world to his new and revolutionary show known as Person to Person. The show made Edward R. Murrow the first real celebrity interviewer and added to his already polarizing legend. The show itself employed remote interviews, which at the time were quite rare. It has been nearly 60 years since person to person first aired and now we have social media to give us our own person to person moments with people we don't really know.

With the advent of Twitter, Skype, Facebook, and many others we seem to have the ability for that person to person feel. The truth is that just like the days of Murrow's show we are living in a time when no matter how open we seem to be there are still secrets that lurk deeply in the closet. In a way the show Person to Person laid the groundwork for social media. The show was proof positive that distance between points could be closed. Murrow interviewed everyone from Fidel Castro to JFK to Marilyn Monroe. Today, nearly six decades later, we seem to feel closer to celebrities, leaders, and groups.

While the secrets that we keep only manage to come out either post mortem or in some dramatic way there is something to be said for the fact that social media was a seedling for so long. Perhaps it's a stretch to connect Murrow to social media but if you really study it there is some sense to that. Murrow was on to something and while it may have long been relegated to the status of a valuable relic it's fair to say it had a serious impact. Next time you see something new don't be surprised if it's what manages to spur a big revolution.

THE THINGS IN LIFE THAT MAKE ME LAUGH

I have to laugh every time I see SMS talk because it's become so accepted that it's almost replacing actual statements and what have you. It's almost like people have become to lazy to write in full words. In the days when I was a kid learning about writing out a complete sentence I remember that answering a simple yes was frowned upon. I guess we are going backward now which is why it's okay to use the alphabet in ways that we never before thought possible.

I  remember the first time I read "lol" on a message I was wondering what the hell it meant. I love how if you don't know what any of that means you  are pretty much an outsider, so far out of the loop, you don't belong in society. I find this funny because not only is it incorrect, it's ridiculous. I am not saying that because I like to write I am saying it because I fucking hate the lazy nature of SMS, online, IM  talk.

Next time you write LOL try to remember what it stands for. Don't type stupid shit like OMFG, OMG, IDK, it's a lazy shortcut and it's not really endearing.

THE INTERNET AS A PERSON

Have you ever wondered what the internet would be like as a person? I think given the vast array of knowledge and connectivity in the web it would be something like Archie Bunker in that it would e full of knowledge that's not always useful, more than a little racism, a lot of narrow mindedness and more than likely a massive asexual nature that would almost completely forbid it from reproduction. I am fascinated by the internet for so many reasons.

None of use can give the internet a physical appearance whatsoever. The internet could be a sexy woman, a fat man, a Nigerian scheme artist looking to spread your family's wealth to you since a horrific plane crash or a dog. We don't know what it looks like but we can give it some shape. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have the internet over for dinner?

I imagine the internet would provide great conversation and an occasional anecdote concerning some unimaginable sexual act involving a bottle, a french tickler, a blender and two different types of orange juice. Then there is the internet's growth into relationships and possible proliferation of the family persuasion. I know I mentioned the internet as asexual but I can imagine an internet child. I think the internet would likely marry Forgy Network, a petite girl in the communications industry.

I imagine the internet would name his first child My Space whilst the second far more gifted and charismatic one would be known as Facebook and a third with the ability to assimilate would be known as Twitter. The internet would disown My Space for being completely lame while watching Facebook marry off to Jennifer Instagram Epstein while Twitter would struggle in a long term live in relationship with Pinterest Long that just won't go anywhere due to Pinterest's one dimensional views and narrow minded nature.

The Internet would never retire and work the same way Fidel Castro has, blocks of eternity. Chances are that the net would run for political office and end up taking the world in some sort of misinformation coup that would employ vast amounts of ignorance from followers. I think that the film TRON pretty much gave it all away as far as the internet goes.

Lucky for us the internet is not a person with said capabilities of taking over the world, or is it?

WHY BLOGGING IS NOT FRUITLESS

I used to think of blogging as another way for over opinionated people to spew their pseudo intellectual pearls on to the rest of the world. I will go as far saying that the word blog itself made me want to throw up in the sense that it was a word used largely by people that I perceived to be complete assholes. One day a childhood friend said "You should start a blog" and I decided to give it a shot just to see if I could be a lesser evil. The first year I had this blog I only put out some six blog entries total and did not bother to look at stats or anything of the sort.

As time went on I kept hearing that question about why I wasn't doing anything with my blogs. I never bothered to answer because frankly I felt that I did not need to do so. One day everything changed as my paid writing assignments started to wane a bit. I began to wonder about my writing and how I could stay relevant to myself. I was reminded of a tidbit  read my first day of class in Full Sail's MFA in Creative Writing program, that tidbit was that writers write. I hear that over and over and I realized that I would be doing myself a grave injustice if I stopped writing on the basis of what I was or was not earning.

Over the last six months I have been averaging something close to thirty entries a month and over that period of time I have been reminding myself of several things. First thing is that writers starting out have to be consistent in order to get somewhere. The second thing I remembered was that writers must self promote in all possible avenues. Every writer has a strong point and that can be anything from telling a story, to relating facts, to giving an opinion. I was reminded that building up volume of work helps get your name out there. In a six month period I have managed to build my stats to nearly 14,000 views in over 180 entries. I have finally taken in enough income to buy myself three candy bars from my google adsense and I am seeing exposure of my work in other countries even if it's only ten people that hit the page.  

If I continue to go at the pace I am going I know eventually I will hit some sort of niche. Blogging also makes social media useful as it's good to showcase your work in facebook, and twitter as well as google plus in order get that work in front of as many people as you can and make sure they are as varied a crowd as can be. The bottom line is that if your serious about getting exposure and building something relevant to put in your resume a blog is a great way to go.

MC HAMMER IS REALLY.............STILL NOT GANGSTA

I came across a bit of interesting news with regards to everyone's favorite wholesome rap artist, the one and only MC Hammer. Charges were filed against the Hammer because he was caught driving a car he did not own. Hammer was also charged with resisting arrest and suspicion of obstruction. What I thought was interesting was Hammer's tweet, which read: "Thank You to all my friends and supporters. All CHARGES DECLINED. Dropped. Have A great Weekend. #OutOnBail." That last part about being out on bail is what makes me crack up. 

MC Hammer's biggest crimes included parachute pants, a thorough inability to hold on to 47,000,000 million dollars and that video for pumps in a bump. I think it's a reflection of Hammer's desire to still be relevant to send out a tweet like that. I like MC Hammer but frankly he is a part of the 90's that came and went and has not yet generated enough interest for a re cycled new rage. 

First this guy is participating in a live performance of that lame ass song Gangnam Style and now he is trying to look shady. There is nothing shady about this guy because he is too legit, too legit to drive a car with expired tags that doesn't belong to, wait.