AN ODD COUPLE MADE IN COMEDY HEAVEN

I haven't really kept up with the news of Vladimir Putin's latest shenanigans, simply because I don't particularly care for him in any respect. When I saw a picture circulating of Putin next to Steven Seagal my curiosity was peaked. I glanced over the article where the "Star" called Putin a brother and so on. I realized then that Putin has a side gig, luring fat has been actors into Russia with promises of of doughnuts, cheese, and fine wine.

I think Putin believes that with warriors like Seagal and Gerard Depardieu he can make make the world think twice about his martial arts and governing abilities. Seagal is a Mob Hitman, CIA Operative, Martial Arts Guru, Action Star, Cop, Reality Star and Voodoo Priest. The implications here are that Putin can learn so very much from the jolly fat weapon of mass pollution, he may well be unstoppable.

Let's see how these two bangerz threaten the world, and yes that was a Miley reference.

TO BE AN EXTREMIST IS TO BE AN IDIOT

I don't care for extremists, they really piss me off. I can have a disagreement with a person but I don't have to insult that person as a result of our disagreement. I was called a drone today as a result of an extremist's view being totally opposite of my own. I like to consider myself a moderate individual but if there's anything I hate more than a jackass it's an extremist.

THE WORM DOES NORTH KOREA

Dennis Rodman's visit to North Korea has sparked some serious moral outrage given his defense of Kim Jong Un whom he now refers to as a "friend." Everyone in the media has attacked Rodman because he has chosen to label the injustices in North Korea as simply "politics" that he does not agree with. I think that this whole situation should be put into some real perspective. 

No one in the media seems to understand that this is Dennis Rodman. Dennis Rodman does not have the relevance of a Muhammad Ali or anyone else that has chosen to use merit and stature as a means to engage in diplomacy and goodwill. Does anyone remember the wedding dress? Does anyone remember "Bad as I Wannabe"? Yes Rodman was a huge star with five championship rings but we are not talking about a Michael Jordan or someone whose achievements stand out as almost singular. I like Rodman and I think his personality made him unique on the court but his actions outside the court in a global aspect do not really call my attention. 

The media understandably feels a need to chastise Rodman because he seems to be employing a tremendous lack of depth. I wonder if the media understands that Rodman is not a Rhodes Scholar. Rodman went to North Korea to have a good time and not to engage in shuttle diplomacy. I am certain that the North Korean government did not take the visit from Rodman as a sign of US approval for their policy on human rights or nuclear arms. 

The media needs to really chill out before continuing to make this story something so relevant that we end up looking like a country that takes the opinions of a washed up sports ex athlete as if they were policy gold. 

THE LAURA BUSH GAY MARRIAGE AD

Former first lady Laura Bush requested that her clip from an interview be taken off an ad advocating gay marriage. The reason this bit of news caught my eye is because the trending headline read "Laura Bush Gay." I am not writing this to give an opinion on gay marriage but rather to point out a few things that struck me. This particular article that I read sparked a myriad of comments that ranged from Nazi Germany comparisons to vile comments on gay marriage.

I personally feel that when someone is going to give an opinion on such a sensitive subject they should be educated on their reasons for being either behind it or against it. To bring the Nazi Germany comparison in is absurd but to say that this is a ridiculous cause is equally absurd. If you agree or disagree with homosexuality it's your business but please be educated when rendering an opinion. I think it's bullshit commentary that not only divides us as a society but also makes us look like an ignorant and rudimentary nation.

People do not need to agree on everything in order to be progressive but they need to have the ability to listen as well as discuss. I think it's fair that as a free country boasting of the best democratic system in the planet we act much in the same manner as our founding fathers did. Ages ago a document was crafted and in detail it outlined a government by the people and for the people, why is it that 236 years later we cannot stick to the hopes for growth and progress that crafted that document?

LET'S BE STUPID

So there is a petition calling for Piers Morgan to be deported. The petition has gathered well over 30,000 signatures and it is quite possibly the stupidest movement against a single individual since Jesus was crucified. I am not actually comparing Piers Morgan to Jesus so settle down you sanctimonious nancy boys. This whole thing comes on the heels of Piers Morgan taking a strong stance in favor of gun control.

Okay if the morons signing this petition stop and look at what the lack of gun control laws is doing to this country they would not be signing this on the grounds of what they consider an attack on the second amendment. Okay yes we do have the right to bear arms but there is no spot that states anything about killing children and yet that happens every day in this country. Do the laws and freedoms also apply to those intending on comitting crimes?

Piers Morgan is using his platform to try and help a bad situation and because of 30,000 gun loving morons we are looking like an ignorant nation full of gun toting idiots. I also want to quote the second amendment for all the idiots out there "A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed." This means a militia not a single lunatic. If we can put a man on the moon we should be able to regulate how guns or weapons of any sort are distributed.

I understand accidents happen but you idiots Sandy Hook was not a fucking accident. I seriously abhor ignorance and how it seems to draw so much attention. I don't always agree with Piers Morgan and I find him a bit arrogant at times but this is one thing I agree with him on. I do believe we need to regulate the sale of arms to the public. If Piers Morgan is attacking the rights of Americans then who is protecting the rights of kids that get killed daily through incidents involving gun violence? Who is protecting the rights of innocent victims getting shot during robberies?

Seems like the backers of the second amendment only know how to read that part of the constitution because they are really ignorant to all other parts of it. I say keep Piers Morgan and throw out garbage like Ted Nugent.

PS. If you are offended by my views go fuck yourself as it is my right to express myself.

WHEN DID FREE PRESS BECOME FRANKENSTEIN?

It's funny how the face of G. Gordon Liddy reminds me of everything that seemed to ruin the US at a specific point in time. Liddy's bald head and his SUPER MARIO BROTHERS mustache makes me think that he in a way was part of the reason why the press went from being selective to being almost completely merciless and destructive. 

If you think back to the old days you learned about in the history classes you hated there is a distinctive difference between press from the 30's to "modern times press" from the late 60's forward. Politics was limited to whatever the press was allowed to publish and expose whatever the the White House allowed. 

So now we come back to Gordon our resident plumber. How exactly did everything go from being black and white to a kaleidoscope of color?  Watergate is really the best answer and with good reason. The White House really did have the power to repress information and to keep people in the dark about everything from our involvement in Vietnam to sanction covert operations aimed at destroying what we considered enemies. 

Watergate in many ways gave new power to "Freedom of the Press." I think that during that period freedom of the press was necessary in order to expose a serious issue with the US and its leader and show the people that everyone was liable when breaking the law. Now by contrast the press has become rapacious and is constantly looking for the next big stumble.  

Today the media has the real power and it's the media that controls who becomes our next leader. Every election no matter the position usually ends up in some bitter smear campaign that exposes every personal difficulty of aspiring leaders. Look at a 50's add stating "We Like Ike" and one now stating "Obama No Bama." The rhetoric has changed and the press and media no longer have a noble agenda but rather a selfish one based on special interest. Thank you Watergate for creating a special kind of monster that William Randolph Hearst would be proud of. 

When whizzing on the electric fence shocks you badly

So this is my first "blog" and man do I feel like a hypocrite. My wife has been telling me for years that I must blog. I never really dug the term for multiple reasons. My first reason for looking down on "blog" is because it made me think of that movie "The Blob." I really thought it was a trendy thing to do and I try to avoid that. The next thing you know you are the next idiot carrying a large cup of coffee and European man bag or purse telling the world that you are going to blog prior to Zumba class. I am into exercise by the way but I do do enjoy saying Zumba. At this point I am sure you are wondering how in the hell does my rant relate to my tittle and my response is patience because I like the build up.

I liken my experience here as that of a person that likes to come near an electric fence and take a whizz. I have never done that but I am sure it isn't necessarily pleasant. I have taken the time to prepare a bulleted list as to why whizzing on the electric fence may be bad and even SHOCKING and here it is:

1. The smell of urine if you are dehydrated and in general is just awful
2. Electric fences have varying effects on a person or animal
3. High tensile wires look fun and you may try the light saber battle but I would not recommend it (reference the film Spaceballs or Star Wars)
4. You may not be able to procreate after whizzing action
5. You are liable to develop freaky powers

If you don't believe it google it or maybe consider the WIKI route because they are highly trained scientists working for the purpose of your edification. At any rate let me continue on because I am building up to a bombshell that is bigger than Nancy Grace's beautifully sculpted hindquarters planetarium.

I saw the blog as an electric fence that I would never come near or whizz on. I have better sense than to do something like that in an open field so it isn't like I would do that any way. Alas here I am in the blog and whizzing on the electric fence. I am SHOCKED because of it but I'll get over it sooner than I got over the breakup of my first relationship in third grade (Recess-Lunch). Sorry if you are disappointed with a great buildup but come on Nancy Grace's ass is just gold.