RADIO GA GA..........

I have heard people refer to radio as theatre of the mind. I wonder if the people that refer to radio as theater of the mind are talking about old time radio. Radio today is more like theater for the feeble minded. I was listening to a popular morning show here in Orlando, and honestly the people in that show managed to make me feel like my life was somehow a little less important as a result of listening.

Stars like the arrogant but brilliant Orson Welles are no longer around, there will never be another War of the Worlds broadcast. The radio doesn't make people think, it causes aneurisms due to how many fucking imbeciles are given a platform to speak. There are people that do try, but honestly the people that try are outnumbered by the imbeciles that can work a board. Video did not just kill the radio star, it raped its will to live and sodomized its talent beyond repair.

I thought satellite radio would improve things but honestly it made it worse. Satellite is a paid option, commercial free, for the highly limited to expose their incredibly poor ability. I am reminded of a song by Queen, Radio Ga Ga. Today all you hear in radio is shit and nothing else. Every station plays the same 18 track loop and helps create stars like young prostitute Selena Gomez. Sorry but I will not be hitting repeat, peat, peat, peat, I'll simply pop in an Elvis or Beatles CD.

BIEBER FEEVER GONE TOO FAR

Worry not Bieber fans as your idol is still the source of much conversation even amongst depraved killers. I must say Bieber Fever has really gone beyond being an STD you get by listening to this generation's version of Paul Anka (google it). I say this because Justin Bieber was the target of a murder plot by some convicts in Las Cruces New Mexico.

To make a long story short I guess one of the killers has a tattoo of the icon on his leg. To me this is an example of Bieber Fever gone too far. Part of the plot was to go ahead and castrate Bieber and his bodyguard Rufus T. Firefly. I wonder if the killers were going to auction the members on ebay. I learned of Bieber Feever while watching Key of Awesome's educational youtube spot on it.

I was not aware of the fact that Bieber Fever could go this far but thank heavens that our idol of idols is safe. Now I say let's move on to more important matters and figure out how the Gangnam Style dude is part of plot to destroy the world through incredibly lame music and horrific dancing.

OH NO SELENA GOMEZ HAS STREP THROAT! PLEASE LET US SAVE HER AS THAT WILL SOLVE CURRENT WORLD CRISES.........

Everyone I need you to please do some kind of spiritual ritual to save our favorite Wizard of Waverly Place from the clutches of the deadly disease known as strep throat. Yes you heard right everyone the head Beiber Fever carrier is now deathly ill with her throat itching as millions of bacteria are killing her precious vocal chords. We need to save her as the fate of the whole world depends on it.

Sorry after further research it turns out strep throat does not really kill people and she is not really the important to the fate of the free world. I still say we form a hand holding movement to show this brave lite doodle how important she really is to all of us. Anyone with me? Bueller? Bueller?  I guess I don't have the backing.

Really these are the news that are trending today and everyone wonders why there is such a generational disconnect. When I was in middle school we were taught to discuss relevant current events and learn to back up our opinions with well researched facts. If a kid shows up with this current event today he is superstar correspondent today.

This is what's wrong people!