THE ART OF THE UNUSUAL NAME

Every country in the world has its popular names. Here in the states you have Matthew, James, Michael, and so on. There is a true art in making your kid's name something no one's ever heard and making it cool. Let's assume you have a boy and a German last name. How would you make the kids's name cool? Start by eliminating the obvious like Adolph, or Kaiser Wilhelm. So how do you narrow it down? 

• If it's a boy look for something that sounds almost macho movie star like.
• Avoid tech names.
• Do not use something that can be sexual like Ballerio which can be likened to ball licker in some way.

It's also important to look at the kid and assess his or her glaring physical features. Make sure if you have a hairy kid you don't name it Wolf or Thestral. It's good to not name the kid for at leas two or three weeks while planning the name. Think in the realm of the magical and then look at superheroes as well. It may be that you are into the goth, so you may want to look at some of the following sources: 

• Ancient Greek history.
• Scythian history, relating to ancient greece.
• Jordanes 

Picking a cool name is all going to depend on the research, your knowledge of the name and ultimately how comfortable you are with ramifications such as beat downs and harassment. Picking an unusual name is an art, don't fuck it up. 

LUCKY BRAND WILL SMOKE THE SHIT OUT OF ABECROMBIE ANY DAY

Personally I have never liked Abercrombie & Fitch and I was not aware that its CEO looked like a stretched out dough boy. I am not saying what I'm saying because of the recent controversy started by the CEO''s remarks that his store is not for everyone, I am saying it because Abercrombie's practices are awfully arrogant for a store that really isn't at all cost prohibitive. I love to shop at Lucky Brand Jeans and everything from materials, to stitching to general quality is far superior to Abrecrombie & Douche. Why does lucky band have larger sizes? I would say that Lucky Brand wants to cater to everyone because they know how to do business.

I can't respect a company like Abercrombie when they have this attitude like they are somehow superior and their clothes meant to be worn by a select few. I am assuming Mike Jeffries is targeting that niche anorexia and bulimia market. I say Abercrombie should use crackheads as models since they are so concerned with appealing to the cool. Mike Jeffries himself may be better suited to appeal to crackheads and junkies in general since he himself looks like a fucking cocaine addict. To be totally honest I don't care for a store that has a moose as part of its seal or brand; I much prefer lions and what have you because they look more impressive as logos than does a moose taking a crap.

I remember being in Amsterdam when Abrecrombie opened a store there. I recall that the line was crowded with women that were definitely above a size ten. Is Mike Jeffries aware that Dutch women are bigger? Is Mike Jeffries aware that people in Holland love to eat well? It's obvious that Mike is still tripping on some great cocaine he likely sniffed from the scrotum of a young Abercrombie male model. Seriously people if you are going to buy something, go to Lucky Brand instead of that shitty flannel store. Lucky Brand is a great store and if you go to Millenia Mall or Florida Mall in Orlando you will be treated like royalty. My point is fuck Abercrombie, they suck ass and their clothes are cheap shit anyway.